Not all of you may be worried about "Mr. Right" right now. Some of you may be very worried about him. But this I know, ALL of you will be at one time or another. So given this is a common concern for young women, here's ONE of my thoughts on the matter.
Have you ever heard of Sadie Hawkins Day? Do they still have the Sadie Hawkins Dance at school? Well here the interesting history of it. I copied the following from Wikipedia:
Original story
The 1st Sadie Hawkins Day
In Li'l Abner, Sadie Hawkins was the daughter of one of Dogpatch's earliest settlers, Hekzebiah Hawkins. The "homeliest gal in all them hills", she grew frantic waiting for suitors to come a-courtin'. When she reached the age of 35, still a spinster, her father was even more frantic - about Sadie living at home for the rest of his life. In desperation, he called together all the unmarried men of
Dogpatch and declared it "Sadie Hawkins Day". Specifically, a foot race was
decreed, with Sadie in hot pursuit of the town's eligible bachelors - and matrimony as the consequence."When ah fires [my gun], all o' yo' kin start a-runnin! When ah fires agin - after givin' yo' a fair start - Sadie starts a runnin'. Th' one she ketches'll be her husbin." The town spinsters decided that this was such a good idea, they made Sadie Hawkins Day a mandatory yearly event, much to the chagrin of Dogpatch bachelors. In the satirical spirit that drove the strip, many sequences revolved around the dreaded Sadie Hawkins Day race. If a woman caught a bachelor and dragged him, kicking and screaming, across the finish line before sundown - he had to marry her!
Sadie Hawkins Day was first mentioned in the November 13, 1937 Li'l Abner daily strip, with the race actually taking place between November 19th and November 30th in the continuity. It would prove to be a popular annual feature in Li'l Abner, and a cultural phenomenon outside the strip.
In popular culture
Capp's creation captured the imagination of young people, particularly in high schools and on college campuses. In 1939, only two years after its inauguration, a double-page spread in Life magazine proclaimed, "On Sadie Hawkins Day, Girls Chase Boys in 201 Colleges" and printed pictures from Texas Wesleyan. Capp originally created it as a comic plot device, but by the early 1940s the comic strip event had swept the nation and acquired a life of its own. By 1952, Sadie Hawkins Day was reportedly celebrated at 40,000 known venues. It was a female-empowering rite long before the modern feminist movement gained prominence. It became a day-long event observed in Canada and in the United States on the Saturday that follows November 9th. Outside the comic strip, the practical basis of Sadie Hawkins Day is one of simple gender role-reversal. Women and girls take the bold initiative by inviting the man or boy of their choice out on a date - almost unheard of before 1937 - typically to a dance attended by other bachelors and their assertive dates. When Capp created the event, it wasn't his intention to have it occur annually on a specific date, because it inhibited his freewheeling plotting. However, due to its enormous popularity and the numerous fan letters he received, Capp obligingly made it a tradition in the strip every November, lasting four decades.
In many localities the tradition continues. Many U.S. high schools, especially in the
south and midwest, hold Sadie Hawkins dances, as do some Canadian high schools. The dances are characterized by girls taking the initiative, and couples wearing matching "farmer" clothes and rural attire to the dance. The dance is also occasionally called "WPA" (Women Pay All) or "Turnabout," in which girls invite boys, pay for dinner, dance tickets, etc
Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like every day now is Sadie Hawkins Day. It is the girl who is initiating anything romantic with a boy. It is the girl who is doing the pursuing. It is the girl who is calling the guy. It is the girl who is asking him out for a date. It is the girl who is paying for dinner. It is the girl stating her intentions to the guy. It is the girl saying "I love you" before the guy does. It is the girl who is proposing marriage.
My mother taught me growing up that good girls don't call boys. Good girls don't declare their intentions in hopes of building something more out of the relationship. Good girls don't ever ask a guy out on a date. Good girls don't ever propose marriage or even bring the subject up first. In a nutshell, good girls should NEVER be the pursuer of a guy. I know that sounds really antiquated and old fashioned. But there is so much wisdom in this kind of teaching.
It is in the base nature of every man (unless he has been stripped of his masculinity and thoroughly feminized) to be a "hunter". When you are the pursuer, you are going against the very natures God created in men and women. It also goes against the roles God intends for men and women. Scripture teaches us that men are to be the leaders in our marriages.
No wonder when women get married, they are frustrated because their husband won't take leadership in the marriage and in the family! He has been "trained" from the very beginning that this girl is going to "take charge" and LEAD.
When you are tempted to be the pursuer, ask yourself this question: Do I really want to be doing this my whole life? Remember, what habits you establish in your dating, become the habits you live with in your marriage.
Still not convinced? Still think, "Well this is one of those areas where Sis. Manley is just showing her age!"?
He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from
the Lord. ~Proverbs 18:22
Notice scripture doesn't say "SHE who finds a HUSBAND..." It is God's plan for a man to pursue a woman and claim her for his bride. And when he does, he will receive favor from God. When you are the aggressor, you are robbing the man of the favor God wants to bestow on him for finding a wife.
I know this sounds very Neanderthal, but it is God's way. You are the prize to be won and it is up to the guy to win you. Don't make the prize so easy to win. In doing so, you only cheapen your value and worth in the eyes of your man and you rob him of God's favor.
God's way takes the pressure off of you. You don't have to find "Mr. Right". You just need to be a woman worthy of winning and God will grant a good man the favor of you for his wife. Letting God have control of this area of your life is another act of your submission to Him and trust in His purpose and plan for your life.
So, ladies, don't be a trinket from the Dollar store but rather be a precious jewel from Tiffany's. Any man can scrounge up a dollar from the coins in his car. But it takes a hardworking, prudent man who is willing to earn and save enough money to buy a precious jewel from Tiffany's.
Don't give yourself away so easily. Mr. Right will find you one day and he will be favored by God.
Love,
Sis. D
